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Trusting in my self today

21 Jun

Written by Kirri White.  Follow me on twitter or facebook.

You can also contact me by email –  kirri@happymumsathome.com

This post is part of the #trust30 writing initiative, inspired by Ralph Waldo Emersons “Self-reliance” that encourages you to look within and trust yourself.

You can find further details regarding the challenge here.

Writing prompt by Author Jen Louden

We live in a society of advice columns, experts and make-over shows. Without even knowing it, you can begin to believe someone knows better than you how to live your life. Someone might know a particular something better – like how to bake a three-layer molten coconut chocolate cake or how to build a website – but nobody else on the planet knows how to live your life better than you. (Although one or two people may think they do.) For today, trying asking yourself often, especially before you make a choice, “What do I know about this?”

Today is a message of heart-felt thanks to all my readers for your ongoing support, kind words and valuable feedback.

I’m extra grateful for your support during the past couple of weeks where I have been preoccupied with the Ralph Waldo Emerson Trust 3o writing challenge.

After spending half of the night huddled up in bed with Ms. Insomnia and ideas flitting through my head in a mad stream, I decided that today will be my last post for the #trust30 challenge.

Convenient because todays prompt highlights the importance of self-trust and self-knowledge.

Things I have been reminded of as a result of participating in this challenge:

  • Honest self-reflection is vital for personal growth and improving clarity and focus
  • Writing is a fantastic creative outlet that can be used to explore places long forgotten or previously uncovered
  • Commitment to the process of writing is important to me but completing a writing challenge just for the sake of it is not.
  • Creativity begets creativity
  • The importance of not confusing pleasure with happiness and income with impact.
  • Dreams can easily become attainable goals with an action plan, an open mind and a determined spirit

Some positive actions directly related to the undertaking of this project:

  • I have connected with some amazing new people and been inspired by some fierce writers.
  • I have a whole heap of ideas bouncing round which I can’t wait to cultivate.
  • I’ve made a few bold moves of my own that have pushed me that much closer to attaining my personal and business goals for the year (more on this very soon!)

On a final note….I am very excited to announce that I have a new website coming!

My business website and blog will all be located at the one adress  http://happymumsathome.com – within the week.

Keep watching this space and, as always…

Have a happy day!

~Kirri

Nothing is at last sacred but the integrity of your own mind. Absolve you to yourself, and you shall have the suffrage of the world. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Speak less of your plans

20 Jun

Written by Kirri White.  Follow me on twitter or facebook.

You can also contact me by email –  kirri@happymumsathome.com

This post is part of the #trust30 writing initiative, inspired by Ralph Waldo Emersons “Self-reliance” that encourages you to look within and trust yourself.

You can find further details regarding the challenge here.

Writing prompt by Author Laura Kimball

I once received a fortune cookie that read: “Speak less of your plans, you’ll get more done.” What’s one project that you’ve been sitting on and thinking about but haven’t made progress on? What’s stopping you? What would happen if you actually went for it and did it?

There is a little secret passion I keep concealed beneath many layers of half-truths and maybes.

Sometimes it emits a burning light  that I wish I could share with the rest of the world.   Other times, it taunts me, demanding to be revealed so that I will be disgraced and humiliated for even contemplating that I could share in it’s power. Ha!

Painful and beautiful…it rests in the gap that inhabits my total truth.

The place I go to play when I dream in glorious wonder, only to awake firmly rooted in doubt…once more.

It’s that teeny space between the ‘what ifs’ and the ‘dont be so bloody stupid’ girl!

You know exactly what Im talking about….dont you?

I did something though.

I made a bold move towards claiming this elusive piece of me.

In doing so,  I imagined that I would rise up – shattering the glass encasing my secret passion and bask in it’s glow…FEARLESS.

Instead, I  realised that it was just the first step in many and that part of me is still holding back, only half-showing up.

Perplexing to have your self-imposed walls re-erected after you seemingly faced a demon. Bah.

I know what my next move is.  I’m just not sure how it’s going to play out.

Isn’t that part of the allure though?

~Kirri

What I must do is all that concerns me, not what the people think. This rule, equally arduous in actual and in intellectual life, may serve for the whole distinction between greatness and meanness. It is the harder, because you will always find those who think they know what is your duty better than you know I. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Wholly strange and new

18 Jun

Written by Kirri White.  Follow me on twitter or facebook.

You can also contact me by email –  kirri@happymumsathome.com

This post is part of the #trust30 writing initiative, inspired by Ralph Waldo Emersons “Self-reliance” that encourages you to look within and trust yourself.

You can find further details regarding the challenge here.

Writing prompt by Author: Bridget Pilloud

Can you remember a moment in your life when you had life in yourself and it was wholly strange and new? Can you remember the moment when you stopped walking a path of someone else, and started cutting your own?

These days were decidedly fun yet predictable.  Dad would ask me what kind of fish I wanted for dinner and proudly present me with the juiciest mangoes from his favourite local market.  Security was rent-free, endless weekends of partying and beach time.

A job I never took seriously and sunshine on tap.

This Gold Coast girl was living large and running with the pack.  Keeping the shadowy whispers at bay by weekly shopping trips and life on the glitter strip.

Two weeks after an “Are you ok?” talk with dad, I found myself walking down a completely strange and wholly new, smog filled street in a very foreign country.  A place that I had fleetingly decided to call home for the next year – Pyon-chong-dong, Kyung-Ki-do, Anyang, South Korea.

Distracted by hunger, I meandered the streets concerned by the fact that I couldn’t speak one word of Korean.  For some reason I thought there would be subtitles…just for me, you know?

I couldn’t order from a menu and I so did not recognize any of the packaged goods in the stores!

Was that a bottle of water or vodka??   Hot and spicy noodles or a cup full of worms?

What the hell had I gotten myself into?

My self-consciousness was compounded by the fact that Korean people of all ages were staring at me, some even pausing to get a really good look, giggle, or ask me for my “famous” picture.

I felt awkward and as conspicuous as a palm tree planted outside Buckingham Palace.

I was a little bit lost, had no way to recognise landmarks or interpret signs without ‘proper’ letters, did not know how to ask for directions or help and…. I also had a class of Korean schoolies to observe in 20 minutes.

The snow – a further companion to my foreignness, heightened my self-awareness and I felt certain that I was about to have a full-blown panic attack.

I had left my dad, my home and country, was single, alone and a complete and utter stranger in this alien land.

A mad adventure and new friends?  An opportunity to learn spliced with a hint of challenge?

The anxiety slowly melted from my limbs as something inside me connected with that stroke of freedom.

A discernible grin spread across my freshly chapped lips…one that suggested just a hint of my awakened spirit inside.

Wholly strange and new? Bring it on.

~Kirri

When good is near you, when you have life in yourself, it is not by any known or accustomed way; you shall not discern the foot-prints of any other; you shall not see the face of man; you shall not hear any name;—— the way, the thought, the good, shall be wholly strange and new. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Surprising myself…

13 Jun

Written by Kirri White.  Follow me on twitter or facebook.

You can also contact me by email –  kirri@happymumsathome.com

This post is part of the #trust30 writing initiative, inspired by Ralph Waldo Emersons “Self-reliance” that encourages you to look within and trust yourself.

You can find further details regarding the challenge here.

Writing prompt by Author Ashley Ambirge

Think of a time when you didn’t think you were capable of doing something, but then surprised yourself.  How will you surprise yourself this week?

At university, I was always one of the stragglers when it came to handing in essays and assignments. Up all night the day before it was due, usually rushing to see my lecturer paper-in-hand, five minutes before deadline.

I wasn’t a lazy-ass, I was a perfectionist, and would pore over papers laboriously, changing and editing for days until somehow it went back to resembling what I initially wrote in the first three hours.

I surprised myself again and again by actually managing to hand any work in!

It was a painful, frustrating process and led to a lot of self-doubt as I compared myself unfavourably to my peers, who somehow managed to complete work in half the time I did.  I think I spent most of my time in the Masters programme, feeling like an undeserving fraud, waiting for someone to tap me on the shoulder and gently usher me to the door.

I still struggle with ‘perfectitis’ and no where is it more evident than when it comes to writing. I have been writing secretly for years but only started publicly blogging in January.  My posts have been sporadic.  The creativity is there, but my inner critic is always stifling it, questioning it and rearranging its apparent shoddy composition.

I usually work on a post for an entire week before I find it worthy enough to be released.

So, why did I agree to join a challenge that required writing every day??

That’s where the surprise arrives…not completely unexpected but definitely welcome.

I have been almost writing every day and I have boldly or blithely hit the publish button with no dire consequences….yay!

Sometimes I enjoy what I have written and hope that others gain some value from it. Other times I remain dissatisfied  but I have surrendered to the process, surprised myself and have to say….it feels liberating!

My aim for the week and beyond…to keep writing and to keep surprising myself.

I will not hide my tastes or aversions. I will so trust that what is deep is holy, if we follow the truth, it will bring us out safe at last. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Your message to the world?

12 Jun

Written by Kirri White.  Follow me on twitter or facebook.

You can also contact me by email –  kirri@happymumsathome.com

This post is part of the #trust30 writing initiative, inspired by Ralph Waldo Emersons “Self-reliance” that encourages you to look within and trust yourself.  You can find further details regarding the challenge here.

To believe your own thought, to believe that what is true for you in your private heart is true for all men, that is genius. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

What is burning deep inside of you? If you could spread your personal message RIGHT NOW to 1 million people, what would you say?

(Author: Eric Handler)

What one thing brings more meaning to life than any other?

What do I aspire to and hope to inspire in others, through all my relationships and my daily actions?

What is this fountain that pours forth endlessly and carries purpose, passion and happiness in its stream?  A place that in sharing you can find limitless connection and personal growth?

A simple idea espoused by many throughout the centuries and for me, phrased most eloquently by a Persian mystic –

It is love that holds everything together and it is everything also

~Rumi

Image and quote sourced from ‘Rumi’

Too scary to write about or do?

11 Jun

Written by Kirri White.  Follow me on twitter or facebook.

You can also contact me by email –  kirri@happymumsathome.com

This post is part of the #trust30 writing initiative, inspired by Ralph Waldo Emersons “Self-reliance” that encourages you to look within and trust yourself.  You can find further details regarding the challenge here.

Day nine prompt by Author Mary Jaksch:

Emerson says: “Always do what you are afraid to do.” What is ‘too scary’ to write about? Try doing it now.

(Author: Mary Jaksch)

Too scary to write about…really?  There is nothing I am afraid to write about.  A lot of scary stuff I have explored remains in a journal aptly titled ‘Don’t you dare’.

Just because you can write about it doesn’t necessarily mean you should – at least in such a public space.

Something that is too scary for me to DO?

That’s easy. To write about.

Confront my fear of public speaking.

(I have Terry to thank for making this more public… in the comments section of an earlier post. Cheers mate!)

My eldest daughter is now seven and required to give little talks in front of her class on a weekly basis.  Maybe its show and tell, discussing the highlights of her weekend or what healthy snacks are in her lunch-box that day. Whatever the topic and for whatever reason she takes to it like the Beckhams to Prada.  Most unlike me.

There have been many times when I have had to take centre stage – speeches and debates at school, presentations at university and coaching seminars. I can do it the but I hate it and I’m not good at it either.

Lets just say that there was a good reason for me being nick-named “Little Red” or “Blossom”.

I’m not going to state here and now how I will exactly tackles this fear, which in my defence is now termed Glossophobia and has been cited as one of the most prevalent fears held by people all over the world.

What I know for sure is that if I don’t do anything about it….My coaching business will not grow in the direction I want it to and I will not be all that I can be.

I will be limited by fear and that’s not how I want to continue living my life.

The other terror that scares us from self-trust is our consistency; a reverence for our past act or word, because the eyes of others have no other data for computing our orbit than our past acts, and we are loath to disappoint them. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

What I would say to myself -five years ago and five years on?

9 Jun

Written by Kirri White.  Follow me on twitter or facebook.

You can also contact me by email –  kirri@happymumsathome.com

This post is part of the #trust30 writing initiative, inspired by Ralph Waldo Emersons “Self-reliance” that encourages you to look within and trust yourself.  You can find further details regarding the challenge here.

Day eight prompt by Author: Corbett Barr

What would you say to the person you were five years ago? What will you say to the person you’ll be in five years?

What would I say to the person I was five years ago?

All that hurt you’re still carrying around?  The raw grief that separates you from others, leaving you both fragile and indifferent? The experience of having your anchor stripped violently away from its mooring, leaving you alone, lost, untethered?

As unbearable as it still seems now…..you will move forward.  The pain will endure but with less power and gravity. You will learn to keep it tucked away in your pocket and surprisingly, there will come a time when you can draw strength from his memory and smile at his face.

From this place of heartache, you will learn, grow and love more than you ever imagined.  You will experience first hand that death does not have the power to end a relationship. Love endures and binds forever.

And that ugly little voice that used to taunt about death and pain and illness?  It will become a benign reminder that this month, day or year could be your last.

So you had better make the most of it!  Seriously.

And you do.

What will you say to the person you will be in five years?

You are one lucky beeyatch! 

Where did you get those shoes?

~Kirri

There will be an agreement in whatever variety of actions, so they be each honest and natural in their hour. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Source of image

Daring to be bold my way

9 Jun

Written by Kirri White.  Follow me on twitter or facebook.

You can also contact me by email –  kirri@happymumsathome.com

This post is part of the #trust30 writing initiative, inspired by Ralph Waldo Emersons “Self-reliance” that encourages you to look within and trust yourself.  You can find further details regarding the challenge here.

Day seven prompt by Author: Matt Cheuvront

“Next to Resistance, rational thought is the artist or entrepreneurs worst enemy. Bad things happen when we employ rational thought, because rational thought comes from the ego. Instead, we want to work from the Self, that is, from instinct and intuition, from the unconscious.

A child has no trouble believing the unbelievable, nor does the genius or the madman. Its only you and I, with our big brains and our tiny hearts, who doubt and overthink and hesitate.” – Steven Pressfield, Do the Work

The idea of “being realistic” holds all of us back. From starting a business or quitting a job to dating someone who may not be our type or moving to a new place – getting “real” often means putting your dreams on hold.

Today, let’s take a step away from rational thought and dare to be bold. What’s one thing you’ve always wanted to accomplish but have been afraid to pursue? Write it down. Also write down the obstacles in your way of reaching your goal. Finally, write down a tangible plan to overcome each obstacle.

The only thing left is to, you know, actually go make it happen. What are you waiting for?

This writing prompt had me flummoxed.  I kept envisaging BIG – things that involved changing the world, lots of money and a sense of danger   The seemingly impossible and frightening.

Strangely, I dont have a fear of a lot of so called adventure pursuits.  I’ve shimmied my way down rock faces, jumped off steep cliffs into dark waters and camped without a shower for three days. Ha – That’s big!

Sky-diving and bungee jumping look like fun, if I were willing to put that amount of money into it…which Im not.

Something bold that speaks to me? Something I gave up on too early or failed to pursue because I was too lazy, because it was too hard ? Because I was scared?

Investing fully in a new creative outlet.

Mastering a foreign language, learning an instrument or joining a local theatre. Any of these would be fantastic. They have often played on my mind but I have always assuaged my inner voice by remaining a spectator.

I like to be reasonably good at something straight away or with minimal effort and if Im not…I have a history of giving up.

So I did German for four years but could never get past an introductory conversation with my fluent father, played the piano for two but was put off by a perpetually grouchy music teacher.  I also danced on and off for more than 10 years (and was pretty damn good) but sadly, never moved past the thought of it not being a “real” profession.

Regrets and excuses? Yes.   Standing in my own way again…yup.

What am I going to do about it?

I’m not sure.  I do know that I will continue to have signs thrown in my path unless I take action- a flyer about a local theatre at the library, watching my daughter at dance class and experiencing envy…ditto husband when he turns Canadian-French on me 🙂

The danger of making promises is that someone may call me out on it and keep me accountable.

Yeah..you guys!

I will explore my options, see where intuition takes me and what I can access locally.   I can promise that I am driven to do this and that I will commit to taking up a new creative venture…sometime in the next couple of months.

Feel free to keep me accountable.

~Kirri

Our arts, our occupations, our marriages, our religion, we have not chosen, but society has chosen for us. We are parlour soldiers. We shun the rugged battle of fate, where strength is born. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Resolve to do only what makes you come alive

8 Jun

Written by Kirri White.  Follow me on twitter or facebook.

You can also contact me by email –  kirri@happymumsathome.com

This post is part of the #trust30 writing initiative, inspired by Ralph Waldo Emersons “Self-reliance” that encourages you to look within and trust yourself.  You can find further details regarding the challenge here.

Day six prompt by Author Jonathan Mead

If you had one week left to live, would you still be doing what you’re doing now? In what areas of your life are you preparing to live? Take them off your To Do list and add them to a To Stop list. Resolve to only do what makes you come alive.

Bonus: How can your goals improve the present and not keep you in a perpetual “always something better” spiral?

The notion of having one week to live is a lot easier to deal with than a mere 15 minutes and I imagine that I would spend much of it going about my ‘busyness’ in a state of denial…..given that I’m immortal and all.   But seriously – this question finds me in a good place.

Aside from over-thinking and a natural-born tendency to worry about others, I truly feel that I am currently living in line with my passion and purpose.   Moreover, I have more love in my life than I know what to do with….want some?  It’s good stuff.

If you had posed the same question six months ago, I would not have been able to provide the same answer…so that speaks volumes.  To me anyhow.

I think its inevitable to periodically be in an “always something better” spiral.  Not to say that I am immune to those feelings but right here and right now –

My life is filled with more love and blessings than I had could have ever wished for.

I am contributing to make my tiny piece of this planet a better place and I’m feeling it.

To Stop list:

-Minimise the over-analysis and pondering in general.  Daydreams are fun but continue to participate in life whole-heartedly.

-Fear Shmeer. Retaliate. Topple them one at a time but remember that you don’t have to do it all today.

-The pursuit of perfection and being everything to everyone?   It’s exhausting right?  Take a break from it.

To do list or things that make me come alive

Playing like a child with my kidlets.  Engaging and connecting, taking part in their games is not only fun but leaves me feeling loved up and carefree

Walking in the sunshine. I’m a regular gym goer and have just started running but going for a leisurely walk, preferably near the water and taking in the air and the life of nature increases my feelings of aliveness and peace.

Socialise more with friends and family  – organise get togethers rather than letting someone else do it or waiting for an invite.

Be bold, spontaneous….do and learn new things that challenge my perspective and extend my comfort zone.

~Kirri

Life wastes itself while we are preparing to live. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Where in the world?

7 Jun

Written by Kirri White.  Follow me on twitter or facebook.

You can also contact me by email –  kirri@happymumsathome.com

This post is part of the #trust30 writing initiative, inspired by Ralph Waldo Emersons “Self-reliance” that encourages you to look within and trust yourself.  You can find further details regarding the challenge here.

Day four prompt by author Chris Guillebeau

Not everyone wants to travel the world, but most people can identify at least one place in the world they’d like to visit before they die. Where is that place for you, and what will you do to make sure you get there?

I’ve done a fair bit of travelling – London, Paris, Greece, Turkey, Spain, South Korea, Canada and New Zealand are some of the most memorable places I have been fortunate enough to visit.  Sometimes I stayed for a week, sometimes a whole lot longer and as any avid explorer will tell you – there is not much that can compete in terms of the depth of life experience garnered, particularly when you’re young.

Senses are on high alert due to differences in culture, food, language, buildings and behaviour. You get to soak up artifacts and architecture previously viewed by media alone and if you are lucky enough…you get to discover that you are far more capable than you ever imagined.  On your own.

You may find yourself alone with bag stolen on a painfully overheated clunkered ole bus, headed in the wrong direction. With no ability to communicate other than hand-gestures *some tears* and charades, somehow you still manage to make that bus turn around so that you make your connecting flight seconds before gate closure.

Them be good times!

In retrospect at least.

While a passion to explore the world can most definitely provide you with a suitcase of unforgettables, it can also bring you back to a place of contrasting landscape rich in colour and as diverse as its inhabitants….. Australia mate!

The Majesty of Uluru

I had to leave home to appreciate what I already had.

I have lived in four cities and three states but have never been over the desert and into the west….part of my story that needs to be amended.

How will it happen?  Just wait and see.

Cheffy hubby and I have started “the trip” fund and hatched up a random plan which involves three small girls, skipping school and a winebago.

I’ll let you know how it plays out.

~Kirri

If we live truly, we shall see truly. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

Source of image 

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